Not Another Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, in a kingdom far away, there lived a royal family.  The king was a stern but good ruler.  The prince was young and adventurous.  He met the girl who would become his bride at a ball when his father wished him to marry.  She was a servant, but that didn’t change anything.  They should have lived happily ever after as all fairy tales end, but this fairy tale was unlike any other.  Prince charming never had a dysfunctional older sister before...

      Jophie didn’t try to hide her grin as her brother, Prince Charming, bellowed her name.  She just sat and continued to read her book.  He would never do anything to her.  That was, of course, if he found her and then, of course, if he caught her which, of course, he wouldn’t.  Jophelia yawned as the hero in her story escaped a fantastic death to return home and live happily ever after.  It made her want to burn the annoying piece of literature.

      Prince Charming yelled for her again.  From her perch in the garden upon the branch of a tree, Jophelia could see him, busy searching.  He was a bit red in the face and his normally soft eyes full of rage.  The idea of putting her brother out of his misery occurred to her.  Plus, she’d get to find out why he was shouting for her in anger.  Jophie honestly didn’t know why, she’d been quite well behaved that day.  She hadn’t even tried to provoke her sister-in-law.  Charming stopped under her tree with his hands on his hips and cast his eyes across the garden.

      Jophelia, being who she was, couldn’t resist the opportunity presented to her.  She bit her lip to keep from giving away her location with a giggle and dropped the book.  Charming let out a curse as it landed squarely on his head.  He looked up now and saw Jophelia laughing at her antic.

      “JOPHELIA!” Charming snarled.  He rubbed his head for a moment longer and then took hold of a lower branch to hoist himself into the tree.

      “Honestly, Charming, you’re no fun at all!” Jophie exclaimed.  “What’s got you in such a rage besides the book, brother dearest?”  Jophie scooted over, away from the prince and watched him.  She thought, albeit fleetingly, that maybe dropping the book was not a brilliant idea.

      “Father is angry with you so he decides it’s my fault you grew up to defy him!” Charming continued to snarl.

      Jophelia frowned.  “You’re not making any sense.  Our father doesn’t think that.  He’s just mad that I caught the Baron with a right hook when he tactlessly removed my sword from my hand.”  Charming suddenly found her ankle, keeping her from escaping.  Jophie stopped her attempts so she wouldn’t knock both of them out of the tree.  Charming, though he annoyed her at times, was still her younger brother, caught between her and her father.

      “Jophie, what was wrong with this Baron?” Charming asked pleadingly. 

      “He wasn’t a Count,” Jophelia shrugged.  Charming frowned.

      “You said that the last Count you saw wasn’t a Baron, which made no sense, so how does this?” the prince scoffed, slightly confused.

      “He wasn’t very nice,” Jophie added.  She thought for a moment about the Baron.  “He was rude while no one was looking and he had no class at all.  He expected everything to be done for him.  I wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d ordered our servants to carry him from room to room and in the duel.  And you saw how he disarmed me.  It was a terrible thing to behold, but even worst when you’re on the receiving end of it.

      “All right,” Charming relented.  “Then why not tell our father that?  Why keep it to yourself when you know he’ll just be angry with everyone until the next suitor comes along to be pounded into the ground?  Which is, if I may agree with what you think, very stupid of them.”

      “I don’t tell him because he always thinks I’m a foolish little girl,” Jophelia replied.  “I’m not.  And I’m not some prize to be won either.  You may be happy with Gwen, and she with you, but the Baron would not have brought me happiness.  Being forced to marry to a boring nobleman is not pleasant.  You never had to go through it.”

      “Then how about you find someone you like to marry and stop driving us mad?” Charming suggested.  He finally let go of her ankle and started to climb down.  Jophelia didn’t reply as she followed suit.  She brushed dirt off her dress as Charming picked up her book.  He tapped her lightly on the head with it before handing it back and walking back to the castle.  Jophelia sighed and started after him, absentmindedly flipping the pages of her book.  She’d have to deal with her father’s wrath eventually.

      Jophie reached the door and nearly walked into Gwen, Charming’s wife.  Gwen blinked at Jophelia for a moment, not saying anything. 

      “Good afternoon, Jophelia,” Gwen greeted.  She used a tone of suspicion.

      “Same to you, Gwen,” Jophie responded.  “You look a little under the weather, Gwen, are you ill?”

      “I’m fine, Jophelia,” Gwen said.  “Just tired maybe.”

      “Well, I’ll glad to hear it,” Jophie said.  She walked past the other princess and stopped.  “By the way, is the king in his room?  I’ve got to get to him before he comes searching for me.”

      Gwen gave her a look to wish her luck, “I think he is.  Though he’ll most likely strangle you if you go in.”

      “I’ll see you at dinner tonight then.  Well, of course, if I live until dinner,” Jophelia grumbled.  She turned and walked off towards her father’s room, a little more light-hearted than earlier.  Jophie wanted to turn around and join Gwen in whatever she was doing.  Still, she was going to seek out her father before he sought her out.  She wanted to maintain the upper hand in the inevitable argument to come.  As she reached his door she contemplated knocking, but decided a dramatic entrance would work better. 

      Jophie threw both doors open, “Announcing Princess Jophelia!”  The king looked up from his papers with contempt.  “Hello father.  I heard you were upset that about the Baron and wanted to set things right.”

      The king’s facial expression never changed as he ordered his attendants to leave them alone.  They didn’t question him out of shear fear.  Jophie stood expectantly and turned her head the slightest to make sure the door had been closed.  When it was, she gave her attention back to her father.

      “The Baron left this morning,” the king stated.

      “Was that why he wasn’t at breakfast?  I assumed he was just licking his wounds in the safety of his room,” Jophelia replied, innocently. 

      “Don’t take that tone with me, Jophelia, I’m in a foul mood,” her father snapped.  “You’re causing more problems than ever before as of late.  What can I do?”

      “Father, not everyone lives happily ever after,” Jophie started.  The king’s eye twitched in the slightest.  “Yes, Charming did marry a beautiful maiden he met at the ball, but Gwen is only human.  I mean, even Charming finds her annoying at times.  She is imperfect as am I only in different—”

      “You do not have to ‘live happily ever after’ to act like a princess, Jophelia,” the king interrupted.  “These duels with your suitors are to stop.  You are prohibited from the weapon training areas.  Tonight the Count of Darwin will be dining with us.  As will his son, the Viscount of Darwin, and you are to be polite to him or I swear I will restrict you from everything, Jophelia!  The library too!  You shall be forced to sit in your room and watch the paint peal from the walls if you are anything but polite to him.  Do you understand?”

      Jophie blinked for a moment.  Her father’s sudden orders surprised her.  “Father, you can’t honestly expect this—”

      “But I do expect this,” the king said quietly but dangerously. 

      “The Baron was horrible, father,” Jophelia tried to gain her composure.  “I would not have married him had he asked for my hand.  I’ll see what this viscount is like.  Though I will not promise you I will like him or that I will marry him.”

      “Remember Jophelia, the fault must be something I recognize as such, nothing small and—”

      “Petty?” Jophie interjected.  The king almost growled.  “I’ll leave you then father.  I think I’ll go to the library while I still can.”  Jophie turned before she could be stopped.  She threw the doors open as she’d done before and glared at the attendants who were hit with the doors.  It was quite obvious they’d listened in.  She wasn’t in the mood to reprimand them for something like that.  People did like to gossip.  Jophelia thought about going to her room and watching the paint peal from the walls for a second, but realized it would be best to tell Charming before her father did.  After talking to him in the gardening, the prince would be calmer.

      Jophie left the castle as she had that morning and headed for the stables and riding grounds.  It didn’t bother her that it was near the weapons area because her father had not restricted her from the stables.  If he said anything, she’d just point it out to him.  Her brother would often go there to think.  He had a natural love for horses.  Jophie didn’t care much for them either way.  When she was little, she’d loved to ride simply because she could escape her life for an hour or so.  Now though, Jophelia couldn’t escape on a small jaunt.

      The prince was sitting on a fence.  His eyes followed the newest addition, a small bay, around the pasture.  Charming saw Jophelia approaching with the look of defeat on her face and climbed down.  He offered a hopeful smile but she didn’t return it.  She stopped in front of him as his smile faded.

      “Father was quite unhappy, wasn’t he, Jophie?” the prince asked sympathetically.  Jophie just shrugged uncharacteristically.  “Let’s go for a ride, we haven’t for a while.”

      She shrugged again.  “Might as well, I may not be allowed to in a while.”

      “Oh?” Charming questioned.  He turned to the groom to tell him to saddle two horses. 

      “He’s got his eye on a viscount coming to dinner tonight and threatened my freedoms if I were ‘anything but polite’ to him,” Jophie answered.  “I’m not to go near the weapons area and I’m not to duel with the viscount.  I’m supposed to act like a princess would act.” 

      “Well, act like Gwen,” Charming suggested. 

      “That’s unkind, Charming,” Jophelia joked.  “In all seriousness, Charming, what am I going to do?  Read all the time?  Listen to him talk about his implausible adventures?”

      “Maybe you’ll get lucky and he’ll be sane,” the prince said.  “Not everyone is horrible, Jophelia.  What if I helped you a little?  If he’s as horrible as you expect, I’ll get rid of him so long as you try.”

      “You never helped me before, why now?” Jophie asked.  She placed her hands on her hips and watched him, trying to read his thoughts in case his words were untrue.

      “You weren’t angry with me today when I came looking for you in the garden yelling and being childish,” Charming said.  “I was thinking before you came down here, you’ve seen so many suitors, maybe father needs to relent.  For a little while at least.  Not to mention as soon as the Baron departed he’s found a viscount.  You are my sister.  You put up with me for a long time.  Me and my fairy tale must bother you.”

      “Well, maybe just at times,” Jophelia replied.  “It’s not like I wanted a fairy tale.  I didn’t want the throne and I don’t have that.  You do though.”

      “Yes, well, I guess I’ll just have to grin and bear it.  I fear my life too much to abdicate to you,” Charming smiled.  “So you do want my help, right?”

      “Only if you swear you won’t make me look bad,” Jophelia consented.  The groom came back with the two horses and Jophie allowed him to help her mount as a princess would.  They didn’t talk much during the ride.  It was like when they were children again.  Jophelia wondered how her brother would get rid of the count and his son and how her father would react.  Would Charming be restricted from things?  Most likely, the count would be the one on her father’s bad side.  Jophie smiled slightly at this.